It’s been almost a month since I penned down something here. I never believed people saying they don’t have time to blog, but I realize they were probably true, and the truth is staring at my face right now: I want to blog, and the blogging josh within me hasn’t waned a single bit, but there it is, as a writing on the wall: I don’t have the time.
A couple of things that happened in 2007 permanently changed the way my life cruises by. Number one, if you have less than a couple of months to go for your marriage, you need a lot of time. And when that happens, when you realize you are entering into a wedlock that you, for so long, were wondering how it’s going to be, your outlook towards life changes. I wouldn’t say the time you spend is an investment, coz saying that would be an understatement, but you need a lot of time. You can’t throw away your time a couple of times every week in the Satyam theatre, or the deserted beaches at midnight, or in searching for the elusive Stanley Kubrick flick in the dark alleys of the Godforsaken places in your city. You can’t be detached to people, your friends, your relatives, the world around you and just be fixated on your work and still lead an unobtrusive and unsuspectingly happy life. You need to get involved. Or, better perhaps, you want to get involved - in invitation cards, attire, travel, tickets, and logistics - all perhaps with such intensity for the first time in your life.
Add to that, I booked a flat. It’s one thing to think about booking a flat, but it’s another to actually do it. There are questions; really hard and difficult ones. Can you shell out so much every year for the next 15 years? What makes more sense – a 10 year EMI, or a 20 year one? Would you have the josh to shell out so much for so long? Will you be able to take a break once in a while? Is that a right investment decision, from the return stand-point? ROI doesn’t look too interesting – is that ok? What is the opportunity cost? Do your finances look ok? And then, there are the chores. Home loans, document submissions, site inspections, listening and convincing people working in PSUs who seem to have all the time in the world; putting up with really outdated procedures and retarded people; selecting tile patters to appease your imaginations; a tired 6-hours-sleep-a-day existence; explaining the builders where and when you want to have your this, that, and everything else.
That apart, you have your work. Office, work, responsibilities, aspirations, and all related assortments that you can’t shy away from. Right now, sitting in Atlanta, all alone in an office in one of the sky-scrapers in the downtown, where I need to pay $9 per day as just parking charges, I’m wondering how life was just a year ago. I was in the US for the first time. I had all the time I wanted, and as the first time visitor to a far-away land, I felt like a kid that ran amok. I wanted to explore every bit of the world, and the momentum and verve were insatiable. I was too busy to notice.
Now, life is even more busy and interesting, but I need time to stand back, relax and enjoy the suspended reality. 24 hours ain’t enough.
